Money talks, but wisdom whispers. That’s the thing about wealth – the zeros in your bank account speak loudly, but the values and insights that helped create that wealth often get lost in the noise. This is where ethical wills come in, and they’re becoming the secret weapon of savvy wealth planners.
What’s This Ethical Will Thing Anyway?
Think of it this way: your regular will handles the “what” of inheritance – stocks, properties, art collections. An ethical will tackles the “why” and “how” – why you made certain choices, how you learned to handle success and failure, what principles guided your decisions. It’s the context that makes the content meaningful.
Your standard legal documents can’t capture the story of how your first business failed spectacularly but taught you everything about resilience. They won’t explain why you structured that trust the way you did, or share the family traditions that kept everyone grounded despite growing wealth.
The Wealthy Person’s Dilemma
Here’s a funny thing about money – having a lot of it doesn’t automatically mean knowing what to do with it. Just ask the 70% of wealthy families who lose their fortune by the second generation, or the 90% who lose it by the third, according to a study of more than 3,200 high-net worth families by the Williams Group.
The common thread in families that maintain their wealth? They pass down more than just assets. They transfer the mindset, values, and wisdom that built that wealth in the first place. An ethical will is essentially your user manual for family wealth.
Writing Your Ethical Will: The No-Stress Guide
First off, relax. You’re not writing War and Peace here. You’re just having a conversation with future generations. Here’s how to break it down:
Start With Stories:
Remember that time you almost went bankrupt but a random conversation at a coffee shop led to your biggest deal ever? That’s gold. Stories stick better than lectures.
Hit These Key Areas:
- The real story behind your success (and failures)
- Your money philosophy (beyond “buy low, sell high”)
- Family traditions worth keeping
- Life lessons you learned the hard way
- Your hopes for future generations
- That weird thing about business deals and coffee shops
Add Some Practical Stuff:
- How you evaluate opportunities
- Your approach to risk
- Ways you’ve maintained relationships despite wealth
- Strategies for handling success and failure
- Tips for keeping family harmony
The Art of Not Messing It Up
Want to know how to write a bad ethical will? Make it a rulebook. Nothing makes future generations tune out faster than a list of “thou shalts.”
Other Classic Mistakes:
- Writing like you’re carving commandments in stone
- Including family secrets better left secret
- Being so formal you sound like a robot
- Waiting until you have “perfect” wisdom to share
Timing is Everything (But Not Really)
Unlike your legal will, this one’s meant to be shared while you’re around to discuss it. Some folks share it during family retreats. Others use it as a framework for regular family meetings. The key is sharing it while you can provide context and answer questions.
Making it Work with Your Regular Estate Plan
Think of your ethical will as the director’s commentary track to your estate plan. It explains the thinking behind your decisions and helps prevent those awkward “why did they do that?” moments after you’re gone.
Good Times to Write One:
- When setting up major trusts
- During business succession planning
- While creating family governance structures
- Before making significant estate changes
The Future is Digital (Maybe)
Some folks are getting fancy with video recordings, digital time capsules, and multimedia presentations. That’s great if it’s your style, but remember – the medium matters less than the message.
Getting Started
- Start collecting stories worth sharing
- Record conversations with family about values
- Write a rough draft (it will never be perfect anyway)
- Pick a format that feels natural to you
- Set a date to share it (or you never will)
FAQs
Long enough to say what matters, short enough to keep their attention. Could be 3 pages, could be 30.
Nope. But maybe show it to your estate planning team so everyone’s on the same page.
Of course! Think of it as a living document. Some families review and update theirs annually, using it as a chance for meaningful family discussions.
Use voice recordings, videos, or bullet points. The format matters less than the content.
The core message should be consistent, but you can add personal notes for different family members.
Need More Help?
I created a comprehensive questionnaire to help jumpstart your ethical will journey. This thoughtfully crafted list of questions will guide you through reflecting on your values, experiences, and the wisdom you want to share with future generations.
Ready to take the next step? Let’s have a conversation about how an ethical will can complement your broader legacy planning strategy.
Contact us to schedule a confidential discussion about preserving your family’s most valuable legacy – your wisdom and values.
Disclaimer: The content provided in this blog is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as financial, legal, or tax advice. Wolf Pine Capital does not guarantee the accuracy or completeness of any information provided herein. Please consult with a qualified professional regarding your specific situation before making any financial decisions. All investments involve risk, and past performance is no guarantee of future results.